


It's In The Brightest Light

by Lilsciencequeen



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: 4B Spec, Adorable FitzSimmons (Agents of SHIELD), F/M, Guilt, Hurt/Comfort, Made For Each Other, Probably won't be canon, Series 4 Episode 9, These two supporting each other, and helping each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-10
Updated: 2017-01-10
Packaged: 2018-09-16 15:29:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9278063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilsciencequeen/pseuds/Lilsciencequeen
Summary: Jemma knew what he was thinking, just how he was feeling because she had been there. She had suffered the overwhelming guilt.And she knew just what to do to help take away from the pain of it.//Season 4B Speculation





	

**Author's Note:**

> I'm back (literally) and canon is back soon so this now exists. I hope you enjoy this. Title comes from My Fault by Imagine Dragons because why not?

“Fitz,” came her voice. “Please, it’s not your fault.”

He shook his head, and ran his hands through his hair as he paced their room. “But it is. They wouldn’t be dead if it weren’t for me.”

Jemma felt her heart constrict at his words. She knew what he was talking about, knew how he was feeling because not so long ago, she herself had been in that position herself. Feeling the guilt and pain of knowing that you were alive when others weren’t and if the blame was tracked back far enough then you yourself could be blamed.

It was Fitz, his words, his reassurances that had helped her fight and to get rid of most of the guilt (a portion did remain and she was sure that it wouldn’t ever leave. It didn’t affect her as much as it previously had but it still lingered there, at the edges).

And now, now she could help him.

She could support him, and though she knew that it would take time, she would be able to say the words that were most appropriate to help with the overwhelming sense of guilt that he was currently experiencing.

She could stop him drowning in it.

She continued to watch him pace from her position on the bed, sitting cross legged in the centre as he cursed himself for what he had done, for what had happened.

“Fitz,” she said, her voice soft.

It caused him to stop and turn towards her.

“It’s okay,” she reassured, unfolding herself and standing up, making her way towards him.

As ran her fingers down his cheek, caressing and reassuring him. “It’s going to be okay.”

He shook his head, and reached up, taking her hand in his own. He brought it to his lips, and kissed her knuckles, soft and gentle. Then he dropped her hand, shook his head and spun.

“It is. Those agents. They’re dead because of me, because of what I’ve done. I helped create AIDA, I gave her the Darkhold. What if it wasn’t them? What if I was you? Jemma, I could never live with myself if she hurt you. I would never forgive myself for that.”

“That hasn’t happened. And it won’t.”

“How do you know Jems?”

“I don’t.”

He sighed. “It’s just…” he gave up, not knowing the words to speak.

“Fitz, I know how you feel. And you know that too.” He turned back to face her, those blue eyes she had fallen in love with all those years ago, they were wide, and full of pain. All she wanted to do was to take it all away. Take it all away so he wasn’t carrying the burden alone.

“The Inhumans?” he asked. She nodded slowly and took one step closer to him and took both his hands in her own.

“I know how you feel Fitz. That sensation of guilt, just how overwhelming it is. How it feels like you’re drowning. And I want to say you’ll get over it, that it will all go away, but sometimes, that doesn’t happen. The pain still lingers, always at the edges. It does for me anyway. I’m not going to lie to you Fitz, not about this, not ever. But it does get easier. You learn to live, you learn to cope. You helped me with that. You taught me that. You were here for me, and that was the best thing that you could do for me when I was suffering that, when I was in pain.”

She sighed, and looked at him, now crying. And this set her off too, tears making tracks down both their faces. “So please, Fitz, let me do the same. Let me be there for you, help you carry the burden of the guilt because you can’t do it alone. You shouldn’t do it alone.”

He nodded and lifted her hands, kissing them. “I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

“I know.”

“I wanted to help, to save lives. I wanted to protect people, our friends. Our family. You.”

“Me?”

He nodded again. “I’ve almost lost you so many times Jems. And I can’t… I can’t bear to lost you. Not again. Not ever. I don’t think I could ever live if I did.”

“I feel the same, you know that.”

“So I helped Radcliffe. It seemed like something… something new… something different to try at the time. But the more I got involved, the more that I could see that the tech, it could be useful. Less agents dying in the field. We wouldn’t have to lose any more of our friends. Trip, Lincoln.” He took a shuddering breath. “I wanted to change the world, to make it a better place for you.”

“Oh Fitz,” she said. “You have changed the world, and made it a better place for me.”

“I have?”

She rolled her eyes as if she couldn’t believe how stupid he was being. “You have.”

“H… How?”

“By being there for me. By being my best friend.”

He laughed at this, and Jemma smiled, and he leaned in, letting go of her hands to wrap them around her waist and kissed her.

She draped her arms around his neck.

Once he pulled away, he allowed his forehead to touch hers.

“I love you.”

She nodded. “I know. And I… I always will Fitz.”

“Then let’s get married.”

“What?” This took her by surprise.

He nodded. “I don’t… I can’t lose you and I love you Jemma, and there’s no one I would ever want to spend the rest of my life with. You’re the one who’s been with me through everything, and I want to be there for you for the rest of my life, for the rest of your life. Jemma, you’re my best friend, and that… that is the most important thing to me. So if you want, would you marry me?”

She nodded, and allowed him to wipe away at one of the tears that were streaming down her face. Then kissed him, passionately.

She kissed him as though she had all the time in the world to, and as though there was nothing to stop them because, to them, there wasn’t.

They were about to start on their next great adventure together,

To them, time wasn’t relevant anymore, they had all time in the world to spend together.

And maybe, maybe things would come up, such as it with AIDA and the LMDs but they would deal with that, and anything that followed like they dealt with everything, and how they would deal with everything.

Together.  

**Author's Note:**

> @ canon plz give us FitzSimmons 
> 
>  
> 
> Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed!


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